Breaking Up and Getting Back Together – Can It Work?
Splitting up and getting back together, can it work? That is a question that a great deal of folks ask. It’s not uncommon to breakup with somebody and later repent the breakup and try to get back together. The question is, will it work? The answer is, this will depend…
It depends on many elements. Below is a list of some items you have to honestly think about before you get together again with your ex:
1) Why did you break-up in the first place? If you broke up because of major variances in your outlooks and personalities and found that you were continually clashing then getting together again would be a poor idea.
Neither of you will be able to totally change your persona. Nor should you. If you’re just not compatible that won’t change. It is time to move on and find someone you are more in sync with.
2) If the reason you separated was fairly minor daily complications you have to decide if either of you are willing, and able, to honestly talk about it and make the adjustments necessary to make the relationship work. If you believe that the two of you are grown up enough to have a truthful discussion of the issues and work on repairing them then you might find a way to make it work this time around.
3) Was there infidelity or abuse? For the most part, if either of these elements were present you’re probably better off finding someone new. Most folks do not really change to a significant degree. If you or your former mate is a cheater that pattern will more than likely go on unless extensive therapy is undertaken.
If abuse is the problem no one should be given a second opportunity to hit or harm you again. Leave, and do not look back. Hopefully your ex will get help and be able to overcome the issue but that type of treatment isn’t always successful and could take years – it is time for you to move on for good.
Splitting up and getting together again, for the most part, can only be achieved if you and your ex lover can be totally honest with yourself and each other. It’s not impossible to make adjustments but it can be challenging and unless both parties are in agreement and are committed to making the positive adjustments needed to make the relationship work, it is probably better to call it quits and move ahead.
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